I had been in and out of the rooms of recovery for about 5 years before I came to Hannah’s House, which was my 9th and hopefully last treatment attempt.
I felt like I had tried everything – IOP, halfway houses, 12 step groups, therapy, medication. You name it. I could quote the Big Book and the Basic Text but none of that knowledge got me anywhere. As a chronic relapser, I felt completely hopeless. Every time I would gather together some sobriety I would destroy everything I had worked so hard to build up by using again. I was baffled and couldn’t understand how I kept doing this to myself. I had begun to think there was something so wrong with me that any further attempts at recovery were doomed.
Doubtful that I could learn anything new, I walked through the doors Hannah’s House and began a brand new journey.
I learned that I have a three-part illness that affects my body, mind, and spirit. The reason I kept relapsing was that I never found a spiritual solution and my thoughts of using always won out in the absence of a Higher Power. I wasn’t crazy. I wasn’t “too sick” for recovery. I was simply powerless. This new presentation of the first step in recovery convinced me that I needed Power in my life. Hannah’s house helped me find and develop a relationship with a Power that is still with me today. They believed in me when I didn’t believe in myself and it was under their loving guidance that I healed. Since leaving Hannah’s house, the obsession to use has been lifted and I have stayed sober for over a year. I am a thriving member of society with a job, a car payment, and friends. I have hope again, something I was always afraid to regain.
But since going through Hannah’s House I truly believe that anyone can recover and I refuse to give up hope on myself or anyone else again. Hannah’s house saved my life and for that, I am extremely grateful.
-Katy F., Hannah’s House at Origins’ Alum
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