My holidays and life changed forever back in 2005.
I “turned myself in” to treatment shortly before Thanksgiving in Atlanta, Georgia after a family intervention. The thought of another holiday season had me feeling even more hopeless and suicidal. My self – pity and shame about not being able to give anything again that season was overwhelming. I would come to understand that I had never been a “giver” during any season of my life. I only gave because I was expecting something in return. A bunch of us self-centered guys were living together in our self-pity all the while being given love and understanding from people that genuinely cared about us knowing that they were getting absolutely nothing in return from us.
We were taught a new way of living that in the process got me hooked up with Higher Power of my own understanding.
It was during that time of treatment during the holidays that I came to understand the true of giving. The camaraderie of like-minded people in the same situation helping each out during difficult times started to have an effect on me that I had never had. I came to understand I had a Dis-Ease that was brought about by my Dis-Connect to my Spirit and my fellows. It was then that I began to understand that my connection to the world was based on my relationships with those about me and the only way to develop those was through giving and not just taking. It was through my taking that had me totally bankrupt during that 2005 holiday season.
I now view life like I do a bank account.
Each time I give, even in the smallest of ways, I’m making a deposit into my account. Over time these deposits accrue interest and every so often it will pay me dividends, huge dividends that somehow are way more than deposits totaled. So it through this giving that I’m rewarded resulting in never feeling that I have to take.
How wonderful it is for the holidays to give us the opportunity to give and receiving the rewards of giving. How wonderful it is for everyday to be given the rewards of giving.
Now I totally realize why Santa Claus is just a jolly ol’ soul.