Posted on September 8, 2017 by Kacy
The concept of enabling sounds straightforward, yet it’s often incredibly hard to distinguish between helping, supporting, and enabling. When alcoholism or addiction is a factor, enabling refers to allowing the alcoholic or addict to avoid the consequences of their behavior.
People suffering from addiction or alcoholism often make promises to stop using or drinking. They may even intend to keep their promises. Unfortunately, real addicts and alcoholics will be unable to do so as a result of the neurobiological disease of addiction. All may even go well for a time. Then something else happens: The person doesn’t show up for work; they fail to stay on top of their bills; they land themselves in legal trouble. When this happens, many people with addictions look for someone that will bail him out. This person is often close to the user.
Enabling behavior is harmful to the enabler, mentally, spiritually, physically, and emotionally.
Enablers often think they are helping the addict when they are actually supporting the addiction. As the behavior continues, the enabler may feel the need to control every situation, often at great cost to their well-being. The result is that the substance user often continues to drink or use. In turn, the enabler continues to suffer.
Simply put, enabling shields people from experiencing the full impact and consequences of their behavior. Enabling is different from helping and supporting in that it allows the enabled person to be irresponsible. Since enabling discourages alcohol and drug users from addressing the problem with professional help, it can lead to situations that cause physical, mental, and psychological harm.
As enablers recognize ways in which they have neglected their own life and needs, they explore why they feel compelled to help compulsively. Both the addict and the enabler deserve professional treatment and peer support. 12-Step support can offer support and a model for life with boundaries and enabling behavior reduction. Local 12-Step meetings may include Al-Anon or Alateen support as well as ACOA (Adult Children of Alcoholics).
Call the “life’s got to get better” people/number at 844-843-8935.