By Katie M., Hannah’s House alum
With the month of April approaching, I find myself reflecting on how much my life has changed in these past four years. I think back and remember all the pain I was in every single day, hurting the people who loved me, causing chaos everywhere I went, and a constant feeling of worthlessness. Before going to Hannah’s House, I had been to a few treatment facilities. I owned about a dozen Big Books that had never been opened and I believed that at 22 years old, there was no way I was going to get sober, nor did I have any desire to do so. Hannah’s House changed all that for me.
There is so much that Origins has taught me, but if I had to choose what helped me the most during my time there it would be the staff. Every person that worked at Origins was there because they wanted to help an addict who was still suffering. They were passionate about what they did, and for the first time since my addiction had started, I felt a sense of belonging. The staff wanted me to recover. They would sit with me for hours and just let me cry about my past. With many of them being in recovery themselves, nothing I said or had done was too much for them to handle and most of them had similar stories. For the first time in my life, I thought I could be sober and be happy being sober.
Before Hannah’s House, I thought that people who got sober were miserable. That every day they had to fight their urge to use or drink and they had to avoid going places and seeing certain people. Today, I can go anywhere and do anything I want. I am not fighting to be sober; the desire to use has been removed. Today, I can truly feel my feelings. My life is not perfect, and I have gone through difficult times in my sobriety, just like everyone else has, but I have not wanted to use because of it. Early in my recovery, I had a friend who passed away due to this disease, and the women from Hannah’s House were the first ones I called. Today, I consider them my sisters. No matter how far they may be, location wise, or how much time has passed, I know that I can count on them to always be there for me.
Origins helped me to love myself, to see that I was worth fighting for. I was shown that I deserve a beautiful life, and today I have one. I thought I was going to treatment to learn how to give up alcohol and drugs, but I was shown much more than that. I learned how to build a foundation to live a productive, satisfying life. During my addiction, I would wake up every day feeling like I could not breathe, that I could not handle another day of misery. Today, I wake up grateful for another day alive and sober. I will never take my sobriety for granted, and I will never forget that I would not be where I am today without the help of Origins. Thank you, Origins, for saving my life and my soul.